We are nearing the end of 2022, I hope that you have had a wonderful year and are looking forward to finishing off the year by spending some much needed time with loved ones. Family gatherings can get a bit stressful, at any stage - whether that's at the planning stage, during the event or after everyones gone home. For me, it’s usually before the event when I'm deciding what to wear, what the family should wear, trying to get ready on time and making sure my house is somewhat tidy for when we return home. For years I used to get so stressed about an upcoming event, sometimes even losing sleep over it! And my family would prepare themselves for the nightmare before the party! All because of the expectations and time frames I had - if they were not met - I would freak out!
When I came to know that my husband and the children were put off going to any event due to my uneasy demeanour, I admit, it was hard to accept. I realised that the issue was that i thought if I got to wear the dress i wanted, had the family look presentable, had my house tidy before we left, THEN i'd be happy, well guess what, a few times I didn't get to wear the dress I wanted, my eyeliner looked funny, and the house had to be left in a tip - and I was still fine because feeling doesn't come from the family gathering or the house being untidy, or a dodgy eyeliner look, feeling comes from the thought we have moment after moment. My only work during getting ready before an event now, is just to be calm and go with the flow. Sure I still have my mental list of expectations and timeframes, and that's fine to have, but I know that I don't have to get all huffy and puffy and ruin the atmosphere in the house if all the boxes on my list are not ticked off.
I say this a lot, but just knowing that nothing or no one can cause me to feel a certain way is such a GAME CHANGER, and this was only possible through understanding the Psychological Switch which just enables me to enjoy the relationship with my family deeper.
So whether you are hosting the end of the year party or attending one, enjoy every moment as you will only ever feel your thinking in the moment.